Sunday, October 5, 2008

Day 274 - "'Cause I'm your average man..."

I got my first Royal Flush this weekend, in a game of Texas Hold 'Em.

A Royal Flush is 10, J, Q, K, A of the same suit, this is the strongest hand in poker.

The undoctored, REAL LIFE picture above shows the royal flush in the suit of clubs, but a royal flush is just as special in any suit, hearts, diamonds and clubs are also killer ultra rare hands.

Odds against getting a Royal Flush? 30,939 to 1.

What are some things more likely to have happened, or will happen to me?

(From the internet...so, you know)
Odds of being injured by a toilet this year: 1 in 10,000
Odds of finding a four-leaf clover on the first try: 1 in 10,000
Odds of being wrongly declared dead by a Social Security data entry mistake: 1 in 23,483
Odds of writing a New York Times best seller: 1 in 220*
Odds of dating a millionaire: 1 in 215
Odds of winning an Academy Award: 1 in 11,500*
Odds of bowling a 300 game: 1 in 11,500
Odds of injury from using a chain saw: 1 in 4464
Odds of dying on a bicycle: 1 in 4472
Odds of being murdered: 1 in 18,000
Odds of dying in a car accident: 1 in 18,585
Odds of injury from fireworks: 19,556 to 1
Odds of injury from shaving: 6,585 to 1
Odds of being on a plane with a drunken pilot: 117 to 1*
Odds of being audited by the IRS: 175 to 1
Odds of having your identity stolen: 200 to 1
Odds of dying from intentional self-harm: 1 in 9,380
Odds of dying from an assault: 1 in 16, 421
Odds of dying from any kind of fall: 1 in 20,666

And my all-time favorite:
Odds of being considered possessed by Satan: 7,000 to 1

I'm very curious how these statisticians came up with a lot of those stats - like the 'dating a millionaire' one. Does the odds go up the more people you wind up dating? Does it stay the same for people who stay home all day and look up random stats to post on their blog?

And the "intentional self-harm" one is the biggest mystery - are these 9,379 people attempting to simply harm and not kill themselves? Either a lot people are just awful at committing suicide (and the ones who succeed, quite frankly, should be posthumously congratulated on beating the odds) or there are a lot of people out there who just don't think very highly of themselves.*

I also bought a glorious new HDTV this weekend. An early reward to myself for finishing the year game-free. In reality, I just have given myself one more reason to want to cheat between now and January:

-Matt

Yeah, but I'd still rather be playing: Pure!


*Mental note - PUBLISH BLOG
*Mental note - PRODUCE FILM ABOUT BLOG
*WTF?!?
*Or...they love pain? I guess that's also an option. People are fucking weird.

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