Tuesday, September 29, 2009

262 Days UP - "I get to be real close to God, I hear that he's a swell guy..."


16 months after being misdiagnosed with cancer in his jaw bone, and a roller coaster of health issues involving ear infections, kidney disease, and finally, a real, actual cancerous lump I could see my poor cat struggling with every day, I was forced to put Milhouse down this past Friday. I mentioned how much I was going to miss him way back then, and the interesting thing about all of this is even though it was one of the saddest moments of my life, the truth is I'm actually feeling really really grateful now more than anything.

First of all, I've been thinking my beloved pet was going to die at any moment since May 2008. That's not entirely true - he recovered from what was actually a really bad ear infection that left him deaf last year, but after that he basically fully recovered and was living large in what was presumably a suddenly very quiet world to him. Then in April we discovered his kidneys were weakening, which we once again assumed was the beginning of the end. The four months later, cancer, which quickly made the kidney problems seem obsolete.

But you know what? My cat didn't die last year like I thought he would. He made it through my year off from games, and he hung around through 7 months of unemployment all the way until I got a job again. Now, I normally reject any discussion of the words "fate" and "destiny" outside of Lost but goddamn if that ain't something.

September wound up being a totally insane month in a what's clearly been pretty damn ridonkulous year. It was like the guy in the asylum that all the other crazies make it a point to stay away from, lest their toes get chewed off. So far, 2009 has been the of some pretty exciting small but significant developments on my part - all bogged down by this pesky lack of a job/financial stability thing. And this past month, all but one single event of September was utterly fantastic - I got a new job, I got to go to PAX, which was ridiculously fun, I spent all month played what I consider to be one of the greatest video games of all time, and last night I was lucky enough to be a part of a fantastic production - a brand new musical that went out phenomenally, and will hopefully be the beginning of a long run at the local theater I also perform improv at every week, another recurring highlight.

This is the opposite of the me of 72 hours prior

And of course, in the middle of this awesome sandwich is a pickle, which, as everyone knows, ruins ANY good sandwich. I can, however, tolerate* the pickle on it's own, as long as I get to eat the sandwich too.

I guess what I am trying to get at with my terrible metaphor is that I'm incredibly grateful for the fact that one of the saddest, most emotionally trying moments of my life was cushioned by so much overwhelming positivity (and this is in regards to not just the great events but also the loving support of family and friends) that gave me the strength to get through it.

Thank you to everyone I know who reads this blog, and even those of you I don't who are supporting me right now as we speak.

And Milhouse, wherever you are buddy - know that you'll always have a place in my heart. You were a wonderful pet, and I'm incredibly thankful to have had you in my life for these past 8 years. Finally, know that to date I've cried more tears for you than any other animal, person, or - I'm actually finally able to say, and proudly at that - event from a movie or television show.

-Matt

*Truth is, I enjoy a good pickle on it's own, just not in sandwiches. Forgive me loyal readers for the brief deception.

1 comment:

Will Claiborne said...

I'm sorry to hear about your cat. I hope, however, your fond memories of Milhouse will be with you forever.

+1 support