Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Poker With Jokers Indeed [Post-Game Update!]

Well, ladies and gentlemen, I kept my word. I beat Ira Glass and David Cross. More specifically, I outlasted them in the charity poker tournament I played in with them this past weekend. And while I was never at the same table as the two of them, I did get to meet, chat, and quickly snap photos with both of them, which was awesome. Here's the full recap:

First of all, I had no idea the event was taking place in the back room of a very cool looking superhero store - behind a literal secret entrance - which already got me pumped.

I started the event with $250 in chips ($90 of which I pitched in myself. Not because I was afraid of being short stacked. No, no, it was all for the kids), and sadly I was seated nowhere near David or Ira, who I was really hoping to meet that day. Everyone was super friendly at the event, and we all knew the event was for charity and we were playing with fake money, but that didn't mean anyone pulled any punches at the table. In the first hour I found myself in my first pot-committed hand. I went all in with an unsuited King and a Jack and went up against two others, both with Aces and Kings and/or Queens. My Jack hit on the flop, I got my first of many surges of adrenaline. Suddenly I was the chip leader at my table.

Time passed, and the bet minimum made quickly limping in an unlikely choice. Something about playing with "fake money" that wasn't really fake money put me in this perfect mindset where I was willing to take bigger risks and be more aggressive, and sometime after the second hour I found myself with over $2500 in chips, ten times what I started with. I was tempted to try to cash out, just to see what kind of reaction I'd get, but the non-stop poker high kept me glued to my table, with only an occasional glance at David and Ira to see how they were doing, and to see what kind of witty repartee I was missing out on.

During the first break I got to chat with Ira Glass, who had just been eliminated. I told him I loved his speech about creativity and he confessed that the speech has become bigger than him, reaching people who had no idea who he even was, which I thought was interesting. I mentioned doing NaNoWriMo at one point, and was astonished to find he'd actually never heard of it before. So there I was explaining what National Novel Writing Month was, and seemingly impressing a creative hero/icon of mine, which was sort of surreal. And thankfully he didn't ask me to read any of what I wrote that month (which still needs quite a bit of work).

I managed to win a few more big hands and stay out of a few others and just before I got to the final table David Cross was eliminated. There was one last break before the final table was formed, and I took the opportunity to walk up to David with a joke that had been percolating in my mind for a while. I'm a bald guy, see, and I though it'd be funny to go up to him and say: "Hey David, I'm Matt. It's always nice to meet a fellow..." and at right here I'd point at both of our bald heads and finish with "...celebrity." So I did it, exactly as planned. And I was met with an awkward silence. My joke bombed, but despite his lack of appreciation my world class sense of humor, he was still very friendly and even took a silly little picture with me. My time in the final round was quick. Just as I was starting to think: "hey, I could actually win this," I was dealt an Ace and a 10, and I decided this was as good as I could hope for, and I decided to go all in again. Two others quickly jumped in and called me out, and none of my cards made it onto the table, leaving me dead in the water with Ace high. The last female player, an pretty young brunette who clearly knew her stuff, lost at the same time as me, so I left the table shouting "well the last attractive people have left the game, so good luck uglies!" which got a laugh and made me feel better about whiffing with David Cross.

It was a great time, and I'd happily do it again if they put the event up next year and get, say, Donald Glover and Felicia Day.


1 comment:

Ryu said...

I read this in it's entirety.